You get into a pub with your friends and you head straight to the counter for drinks. Seated at the bar is this hot guy. He says hi and you smile back and then you end up talking for hours. Not only is he funny and smart, but you seem to share the same interests. You think you have hit the jackpot and exchange numbers.

Before you leave he stands up from his tall stool to hug you and you can practically draw a map on top of his head. You are not wearing your regular sky-high heels but you are towering over this charming cute guy. He is everything you would want in a guy but he is just too short for you, what would you do?

I know what my friend did; she thanked the guy for a good time at the bar and never picked his calls. She says she tried not to focus on his size, but rather the quality of the man but couldn’t help it. Was she cruel or mean to the guy?

 Women and height
I understand where she is coming from because when it comes to dating, women look  at height  first and second at the guy’s  face. If the guy is tall, then she will look at his face. If the guy is short, then her mind automatically switches off.
Personally I have this silent rule that if I am interested in a guy, he should at least be my height, if not taller. I have never dated a guy who is shorter than me; it’s just a preference that comes naturally. I can tolerate a guy who is as tall as me only when I like him very much. I would say that most women hold the same view.

Maybe it’s easier that way. People don’t think twice when they see a shorter woman with a taller man, but when it’s the other way round it tends to create chatter.  “Height isn’t a deal-breaker per-se, it’s just something that always lingers,” said a friend. My friend is 5’5 and I remember a time she was dating a guy who was the same height as her. They looked like an adorable pair of kids and everybody would look at them and saw “aaawwww” . Nobody took them seriously and after a while she called it quits.  

Cave man days
Blame it on the genes war. In the dark days, women looked out for tall, huge, athletic men because they were viewed to have stronger genes and had the capability to protect and provide for her and her children. This stands to date; and many women still desire a strong muscular man. Studies have even shown that tall men are viewed as more powerful, more in control and also make more money. I like the feeling of being next to a big, strong man; it gives me the illusion of being protected.

Men too agree. There are many guys out there who specifically look for shorter women -- there are always exceptions to any rule – but all the tall men I know say they prefer women who are shorter than them. One even said that it would make him feel less of a man if his woman was taller than him. He said he would rather she was fatter but never taller. My girlfriends say they can handle being an inch or so taller than a guy, but anything more would make them feel large and unfeminine. Maybe nature intended that the man be taller than the woman

We see it and adopt
Preference for tall men is also a culture that is instilled by the media. In the same way that thin women are portrayed as most desirable, so are tall men. Movies and fairy tales all depict the perfect man as a tall towering man leaning down to kiss a shorter woman not the other way round.

I remember the hullabaloo that the media caused when Tom Cruise married Katie Holmes; they always portrayed the couple as awkward due to the height difference. On the other hand they portrayed Eva Longoria and Tony Parkers as the cute adorable couple. So it is inevitable that this message will be captured somewhere in our subconscious.

Women also avoid short men because 75 per cent of the time they have issues! They are obnoxious, almost arrogant and in all the cases insecure. They call it the short man syndrome and it’s intolerable. I knew this short guy who was a bully in every sense; he was always picking fights and abusive. They say it’s their natural tendency to make other feel inadequate to compensate their own inadequacy, which they are all in denial about it.

But a friend told me that the saying ‘the shorter the monkey the longer the tail’, holds true to them, if you know what I mean. Other short men make up for their height by making more money and striving for powerful positions. But even then they still have the Napoleon complex that many can’t stand. I would love to believe that good things do come in small packages but maybe it will take years of therapy.

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