| PARENTING: I want my cerebral palsy nephew to be happy | Send to a friend |
| Saturday, 13 November 2010 09:03 |
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Robert Thomas from Arusha Hi Robert, I am happy to receive such letters whereby I can reach out and guide parents. I am sure your sister has experienced as much frustration, depression and challenges as your nephew himself. Since cerebral palsy is not completely curable, the disability remains and so do the troubles. Imagine how difficult it is for a parent to raise an absolutely healthy child – one who has no physical and mental disabilities, then what can we say about raising a disabled child! A brief on cerebral palsy Cerebral Palsy is chiefly a motor disability resulting from problems in cerebrum functioning. Gross and fine motor movements of the limbs and often even speech and sight are affected, but it doesn’t involve mental retardation. In fact, there are many such children who are very bright and who manage to live fairly successful lives. Your sister’s concern It’s wonderful to know that here is someone wanting to support his sister and nephew. The most important thing would be to support them through their frustration and increasing their self-confidence. Inspite of what your nephew says, she is the one closest to him and one who can understand him most. Her struggle in balancing her son’s needs and her other roles is definitely immense which can bring many ‘sad’ moments. At the name of disability, financial aid can be found in plenty but having someone out there who can listen, appreciate and understand is least found. Your role With a Cerebral Palsic son at 27, her mind could be filled with a lot of questions – his career, his future, his marriage. You can do your best by giving her a pat on the back for her bravery and standing besides her with an empathic ear, allowing her to vent out her troubles. A simple “I can understand your pain, I am around whenever you need to talk,” can be very healing. After listening to her, do your best in helping her in a way that is respectful, not pitiful. Helping your nephew It is normal for your nephew to feel that there are times when your sister doesn’t understand him. It would be the voice of the emotional tornados that would be rising in his heart – the feelings of extreme helplessness, loneliness, probably even worthlessness. In helping your nephew, you want to address these emotions and encourage him to talk it all out and make him realise that he is still a worthwhile individual and that he can live a quality life inspite of his conditions. There could be things that he can’t share with his mother. You could do a great job by fitting into a fatherly role, thinking and talking out the man’s way. You can also be the silent billboard that can bridge interaction gaps between him and your sister. A frustrated child typically expects his caregiver to automatically understand his emotions like reading his mind that is not always a fair deal. Your nephew could easily overlook your sister’s day to day struggle in raising him which can easily get her entangled in her own thoughts and worries. What next There are many other ways in which you can help your nephew. Get him to be financially independent whether through a job or a business. Involve him in other productive acts and hobbies and get him his rightful benefits from the government like receiving writers for exams and free vocational training. Also seek support from rehabilitation centers. High self-confidence will help your nephew to be self-reliant. Inspire Stephen Hawking is an excellent example of how a differently abled individual can make great contributions to the world. Get your nephew to lead a productive and meaningful life. Add this page to your favorite Social Bookmarking websites           |
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we invite your sister or your nephew to become a fan of Cerebral Palsy Support and Research on Facebook for the latest information about cerebral palsy and for support from other members.
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