From chaos to clarity: Embracing ADHD and finding purpose

By Sunday Kapesi

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition which affects one’s focus, emotional regulation, and impulse control.

It can cause persistent symptoms of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity.
It often goes undiagnosed, leading individuals to develop negative coping mechanisms to manage its symptoms.

For me, these included hyper-sexuality, alcohol and substance abuse, phone addiction, and impulsive decision-making.
I also turned to sugar—a milkshake every morning for years—to satisfy my brain’s constant craving for dopamine.

These behaviours gave temporary relief but came with severe consequences: weight gain, dental issues, and intensified anxiety.
ADHD has a paradoxical nature. When we’re deeply interested in something, we hyper-focus.
But when we aren’t, procrastination, overwhelm, and emotional dysregulation take over.
This cycle leads others to label us as lazy or unreliable, which only worsens the self-doubt.

Recognising these patterns—and their roots in ADHD—was my first step toward healing.
ADHD is divided into three primary presentations; predominantly inattentive (ADHD-PI or ADHD-I), predominantly hyperactive-impulsive (ADHD-PH or ADHD-HI), and combined presentation (ADHD-C).
Globally, ADHD affects about 5-7 percent of children and 2.5 percent of adults, though many go undiagnosed.

In African contexts, underdiagnoses is rampant due to stigma, misinformation, and cultural misconceptions about mental health.
My journey from chaos to clarity as I came to understand ADHD and how it shaped my life was a major turning point.
I grew up in a stable home, attending private school and excelling academically and in sports.

My parents created a structured environment that allowed me to thrive, masking many ADHD traits.
Structure kept me focused and organised, and I didn’t face the impulsivity, time blindness, or emotional dysregulation common with ADHD.
But when I moved countries and started over, that structure disappeared.

Life became chaotic, and without the tools to manage ADHD, I lost momentum.
My career stalled, relationships deteriorated, and I turned to alcohol and drugs to cope. By age 40, I hit rock bottom and entered rehab.
In rehab, a comprehensive mental health assessment revealed ADHD alongside anxiety, depression, insomnia, and grief.
This was my lightbulb moment. It explained my impulsivity, procrastination, and emotional highs and lows.
For years, I’d struggled with a condition I didn’t know I had.

ADHD arises from brain maldevelopment especially in the prefrontal executive networks that can arise either from genetic factors (different gene variants and mutations for building and regulating such networks) or from acquired disruptions to the development of these networks and regions; involved in executive functioning and self-regulation.

Their reduced size, functional connectivity, and activation contribute to the pathophysiology of ADHD, as well as imbalances in the noradrenergic and dopaminergic systems that mediate these brain regions.

Genetic factors play an important role; ADHD has a heritability rate of 70-80 percent.
The remaining 20-30 percent of variance is mediated by de-novo mutations and non-shared environmental factors that provide for or produce brain injuries; there is no significant contribution of the rearing family and social environment.
Very rarely, ADHD can also be the result of abnormalities in the chromosomes.
Research shows that people with ADHD are 5-10 times more likely to struggle with addiction than neurotypical individuals.

The constant search for dopamine—whether through substances, risky behaviour, or sugar—makes ADHD a significant risk factor.
A study published in The Lancet found that adults with undiagnosed ADHD often develop co-occurring conditions like depression and anxiety, further compounding their struggles.
In today’s digital age, phone addiction has also become a major issue, with studies linking ADHD to excessive screen time and social media use.

Breaking the stigma
ADHD, like many mental health conditions, remains misunderstood—especially in African societies.
Cultural and religious beliefs often dismiss mental health issues as laziness or moral failings.
Psychological ailments are still taboo, and few public figures openly share their experiences with ADHD.
This stigma prevents people from seeking help, leading to unnecessary suffering.
We need more heroes who can inspire others by living authentically and constructively with ADHD.

Recovery and management
Recovery isn’t just about quitting substances; it’s about replacing negative mechanisms with positive ones.
I learned that ADHD requires proactive management. For me, that includes:
Exercise: Running, yoga, and fitness boost dopamine and keep me grounded.
Therapy: Unpacking emotions and past traumas helps build resilience.
Structure: Clear routines and goal-setting reduce overwhelm and keep me focused.
Mindfulness: Meditation keeps my mind present and calm.

I came to learn that I am not disabled. Diagnosis didn’t define me; it empowered me. Understanding this changed the trajectory of my future.
I immersed myself in learning about ADHD. I follow experts like Dr Russell Barkley, listen to podcasts like How to ADHD, and participate in an ADHD support group in Kenya.
These resources help me manage my condition and advocate for others, especially children.
Managing ADHD requires a holistic approach. For me, medication like Concerta (27 mg daily) plays a crucial role.
It stabilises my mood and helps me focus.
However, medication is just one piece of the puzzle and each case is unique.
Therapy, lifestyle changes, and community support are equally vital.

We must act collectively to change the narrative around ADHD and mental health:
Governments: Implement policies that prioritise mental health, testing, and treatment.
Educators: Train teachers to recognise ADHD in students and adapt teaching methods to support them.
Parents: Seek early diagnosis and create supportive environments for children.
Adults: Embrace open conversations about neurodivergence to normalise these experiences.

ADHD isn’t a limitation—it’s a different way of thinking. With the right support, individuals with ADHD can thrive and contribute meaningfully to society.
Rehabilitation taught me that ADHD wasn’t a flaw—it was a different way of experiencing the world. With awareness and the right support, I could rebuild my life.

Today, I’m proud to be a recovering addict and alcoholic. ADHD no longer controls me; I control it. I’m a better father, an empathetic advocate, and a mental health champion.
My journey has taught me that awareness is the first step toward change. With the right tools, anyone can turn their struggles into strengths.