Marriage's like playing Jumanji! Don't tamper with the rules

One of the most fascinating films I like is a fantasy film starring Robin Williams, Jumanji. This is a deadly magic board game found by its characters.

Williams plays Alan Parrish, a man who became trapped inside Jumanji as a young boy. After he is freed 26 years later by a new set of players, he must help them complete and survive the game.

According to Van Allsburg, the name Jumanji is a Zulu word meaning "many effects," referring to "the exciting consequences of the game," which include the unleashing of wild monkeys, untamed tigers, and huge spiders into the world. The board game Jumanji originated in Africa.

Our marriage relationships are like playing Jumanji; certain rules must be observed; otherwise, spouses seriously start facing many effects. What are these rules?

Don't use foul language

The Jumanji board hates profane language. The s-words and f-words are spat out. Similarly, in marriage, as a rule of the jungle, if you're to succeed and enjoy your marital relationship, avoid foul language, however angry you are.

Avoid words like "you bitch"; you're hopeless! You can go to hell! You're useless! You're a witch! If you avoid profane language, you'll excel.

Don't leave the game unfinished

Jumanji board game play must be finished. For Jumanji players to successfully reset the world around them, they must finish the game and make it to the titular city of gold.

Similarly, marriage only makes sense or even gets enjoyed when spouses treat it as a permanent relationship. If you don't intend to go to the end, do the world a favour—don't marry.

Don't cheat!

When Peter cheated in Jumanji, he deliberately rolled a 12 and tried to win. The game hated that, and as a punishment, it turned Peter into a monkey.

That's what the game does; it doesn't like cheaters, so it will either turn you into some sort of animal or a state of being. Similarly, when partners cheat, they automatically turn into horrible partners. Don't cheat! 

Avoid filling the doomsday grid

In Jumanji, if the doomsday grid fills up, all players have lost, and the game is over. The danger cards placed on the grid represent the danger that overtakes the town.

As the game progresses in Jumanji, danger cards are added to the grid. But try not to fill the grid with cards.

In the same way, in marriage, some things bring doom: Foul language, disrespect, physical abuse, emotional fallacy, selfishness, and an unforgiving spirit are real danger cards; if these fill the marital relationship, game over!

Finally, when playing Jumanji, remember that profane language and stealing bring curses, and cheating has serious repercussions.

At the same time, instructions advise players not to begin unless they intend to finish the game by reaching the crystal ball centre and calling out the name Jumanji. So, adhere to the instructions.

Amani Kyala is a counsellor, writer, and teacher, 0626 512 144