Men, women are dying to hear your voice, speak up

While growing up in the village, there was this chap, now deceased, who was a darling to all the girls in the entire village and beyond the river.

He would be seen escorting a girl and 30 minutes later, he would be bringing to his room another. We were envious. He did not have the looks and just like the rest of us, lived in his parents’ home.

He was indeed too ordinary but this notwithstanding; he sniffed beautiful girls like a hyena does its prey and went for them with the resolve of an eagle.

Before the ravages of old age and other life’s humdrums had taken a toll on our bodies, we had what it took to have the best girls in the village.

We were handsome, witty, smart, and also had the main criteria of all – we had bagged handsome results in both Ordinary and Advanced levels and were headed for the prestigious institutions of higher learning.

We walked with our heads high. When I thought about it later in life, I realized that we were too shy and full of fear of rejection.

Not that we had ever been rejected, and the girls were indeed dying for us and friendly to us and even made advances that either we did not notice their intentions or we lacked where to start the conversations.

Talking like a madman helps

Women love chit-chats. Some of us are still as stern as pathologists working on a decomposing body or those military officers. Whenever we talk, our talk has certain imports in it.

Women are not interested in the war in Russia or Newton’s third law of motion or how nuclear fusions work to produce energy in a nuclear reactor. I have noticed that women are too averse to your intellectual mumblings. Keep that for your boys.

Align yourself with her train of thought no matter how mundane to you it may be. If she likes cats, talk about cats even if you hate them with a passion. You may even read about cats even if that takes your time for a cold beer.

Pretend as much as possible and talk yourself hoarse. Never forget to compliment her even when you do not mean it. Women are desperate for compliments.

Practice chivalry even if you were born in the darkest nook of your village and, yuppie! You have the woman of your choice.