My darling's having relentless dolphin's limerence

Dolphins are incredibly socially skilled and highly intelligent marine mammals that breathe in air and give birth to live young ones like humans.

Dolphins are part of the family of toothed whales, including orcas and pilot whales. They're also swift, joyful, and playful creatures that share many emotional similarities with humans. 

Moreover, dolphins are like human beings, and it's not yet known why.  They're very curious, showing great interest in getting close to people and developing affection for their human caretakers. Since the happy and hazy days of our courtship, my wife Esther and I have been in constant limerence.

Limerence is a state of being obsessively infatuated with someone, often accompanied by delusions or a desire for an intense romantic relationship with that person.

It's romantic feelings for a spouse that include thoughts of deep connection and affection. Esther and I have constantly maintained and reciprocated our love.

We can all learn from dolphin's habits. I've observed that dolphins have:

Sensational sense of fellowship: Dolphins have a great sense of fellowship, and they're very social animals that need interaction to hunt, copulate, or defend themselves. Interaction can be seen in dolphins, for instance, when they play. Both young and adults chase each other and have fun. Relationships need to be fun if they're to be enjoyed.

Special and mysterious limerence: Throughout their lifetime, human beings interact and make relationships with a wide range of people—dolphins do the same with each other. These small-toothed cetaceans are easily recognisable for their curved mouths, which give them a permanent “smile.” 

Unlike many other mammals, they form lifelong pair bonds with specific partners. The bond between a male and female dolphin is so strong that it often lasts long. The indication of dolphin friendship and affection certainly demonstrates a capacity for their emotion. These emotions are so limerent.

No wonder King Solomon, the ancient ruler of Israel, once said, "May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always; may you ever be intoxicated with her love." How much are you intoxicated?

Significant sense of responsibility and reliability: When you're more mature, you develop the ability to maintain excitement despite life's circumstances. Yeah, we can still keep our vasopressin, testosterone, and oxytocin high by eating, drinking, dressing, and mindset. If you eat foods that raise libido, then the atmosphere will always be electric.

To conclude, now you've started seeing that the first flash-dancing and knee-buckling sensational experience of falling in love can last a lifetime.

Many have experienced limerence only in their platonic relationships. But tell you what? Relentless limerence with your spouse is such superb stuff, whatever name they call you! Some have seen us as people with obsessive-compulsive disorder, but that's what it means to be crazily in love.

Amani Kyala is a counsellor, writer, and teacher, 0626 512 144.