Mseka made a basket with his own HAND; officials present PRESENTS
To produce a good text that educates or informs your readers, knowledge of English is not good enough in itself; being extra cautious and engaging the support of a capable and dedicated proofreader can be quite essential.
Too much belief in yourself may result in depicting you as a semiliterate individual masquerading as a journalist! We all make mistakes, so goes an old saying.
Having stated that, let us take a look at a story appearing on Page 5 of the tabloid associated with this columnist (Thursday, January 2 edition), whose headline reads, ‘Students reflect on Beijing Declaration’. In Para 4 of her story, the scribbler writes: “University of Dar es Salaam ‘Students’ (UDSM) Mr John Mlelwa told…that the country has made remarkable progress promoting economic justice for women…”
Check that out! The matter of linguistic incompetence doesn’t come in here; but recklessness, yes! The word “students” is nonsensically used because the subject is singular—Mr John Mlelwa. And UDSM should have been placed immediately after “University of Da es Salaam. Basic, isn’t it?
Let us now look at Bongo’s huge and colourful broadsheet’s Friday, January 3 edition, whose Page 4 is carrying a photo whose caption reads: “Raymond Maseka who is cared for at Misufini Elderly Camp at Umba Village in Ngomeni Ward, Muheza District, showcases a basket and a hat he made with his own HAND. This was AT EVENT held when district officials toured the centre to PRESENT New Year PRESENTS including foodstuffs…”
Let us provide a rewrite, in which we will, among other things, get rid of the monotony of saying “present NY presents.” Here we go:
“Raymond Maseka…showcases a basket and a hat he made with his own HANDS (not hand). This was AT AN EVENT (not at event) held when district officials toured the centre to PRESENT New Year GIFTS (not presents) including foodstuffs…”
On the same page, there’s a story entitled, ‘Police in drive to curb reckless driving’, in which the scribbler writes in the intro: “Police in Kagera Region HAS pledged to take strict legal action against bus owners operating within and outside the region to curb reckless driving PRACTICES.”
Hello! Police as an institution carries a plural verb—Police in Kagera HAVE (not has) pledged… And then, qualifying the action “reckless driving” with “practices” is to entertain verbosity. Just say: …curb reckless driving.
Finally, we move on to deliver a few gems from Bongo’s senior-most broadsheet of Saturday, January 4. In this one, there’s a story on Page 3 with the headline, ‘Mwinyi urges Zanzibaris to exploit project opportunity’. Therein, the scribbler writes in Para 2: “He encouraged residents, especially YOUTHS and women seeking employment to take advantage of the existing and upcoming opportunities to improve their lives…”
“Youths” and women? Nope! We say “the YOUTH and women” since the President was speaking about “vijana” in reference to young people of both genders—male and female. You may say “youths” when referring to young males only.
Towards the end of his story, our scribbling colleague based in the Clove Isles reports: “On HIS part, Zanzibar Minister for Infrastructure, Communication and Transport…assured residents that all ongoing…projects are being built to international quality standards.”
Hang on, siree! We don’t say “on” his part? We say FOR his part.
Page 4 of the esteemed broadsheet has a story entitled, ‘Samia releases 4.7bn/- for stalled Tanga – Pangani project’, in which an MP is purportedly quoted as appealing to a visiting minister thus: “Minister, please convey our gratitude to the President. We are immensely thankful FOR her in REGARDS to these funds that will enable the contractor to return to work…”
Thankful “for” her? Nope, we say “thankful TO her”. And do we say “in regards to”? No, thank you! We say in REGARD to…. Saying WITH regard to… is also okay.
Ah, this treacherous language called English!
