Suspicious guards and the bicarbonate of soda incident

Somewhere along one of our borders I embarked and found the guards waiting. It is normal to be searched and questioned when entering any port of the world. I remember once while travelling in Latin America, I carried an unusual instrument called the berimbau.

On sight berimbaus are transformed bows and arrows that make droning type of music with an attractive, distinct, unusual, ancient sound.

According to ethnologists, the earliest mention of the berimbau was Urucongo. Dating back to 1856. However, French researchers found this one-stringed African instrument dating to 5000BC.

Music historians tell us Stone Age people used the instrument to attract animals and birds. Upon coming near they then attacked the creatures with the arrow. Africa has different types. Among the Wagogo in Tanzania we have the mandondo. Not known by many, but in 1996, the legendary traditional musician, Hukwe Zawose (who passed on in 2004) confirmed to me that mandondo is indeed one of many berimbau forms.

These stringed instruments are scattered and well known across the planet, for instance cellos, violins, guitars, mandolins, even the popular Zeze which we are familiar with in East Africa.

And so I had the most famous version from Angola; renovated by Afro-Brazilian slaves and used in the martial arts, capoeira. Capoeira was developed by Brazilian slaves around three hundred years ago, to fight cruel Portuguese slave masters.

A mix of high kicks, gymnastics and feinting tricks. Next to soccer, capoeira is regarded as the most popular physical fitness sport in Brazil.

Unlike Asian karate, kung fu, aikido, or ju jitsu, Brazilian capoeira uses music in its setting. And the leading gadget is the berimbau.

So as I disembarked at the South American country, the Spanish speaking guards stopped me, watching, apprehensively, suspiciously.

“ESO ES UNA PIPA OU UN ARMA?”

One enquired loudly.

IS THAT A SMOKING PIPE OR A WEAPON?

I said it was a music instrument. They ordered I step aside as other travellers passed through while the whole search focused on me, the strange African.

Having sought the intervention of their senior, they glared at me as a potential terrorist. It was the mid-1990s and the whole world being galvanised by random mass killers. The 1994 genocide in Rwanda. A million slaughtered. Sarin gas attack in a Tokyo underground train where 14 perished. Plus the mass killing of 168 innocents in Oklahoma, USA. Meanwhile, wars raged in Middle East, Eastern Europe, etc.

Now I had to defend my art, my livelihood as a travelling musician.

“This is a music instrument. And I can play it for you,” I suggested in Spanish.

They pointed guns at me and ordered me to shut up and wait for their senior officer.

Little did I know.

This prolonged, anxious, wait for a senior member of border security forces would be repeated at the Dar es Salaam in December 2021.

So as the man with the stars on his shoulders arrived, his face serious, a pistol almost drawn, I smiled inside wondering how this circus would end.

Few minutes later, I had the berimbau opened and tuned then played them a lovely number. They smiled and apologised. Who does not love the berimbau’s ancient sound?

Drama on territorial frontiers.

So at Dar es Salaam I had Glucosamine tablets for my aunt who has arthritis of the knees. Google says Glucosamine is “used by the body to make other chemicals that build tendons, ligaments, cartilage, and the fluid that surrounds joints”.

Taking Glucosamine “might increase the cartilage and fluid around joints and help prevent their breakdown”.

So the border personnel would not hear my explanation. They insisted I break the seal and expose the tablets.

“Drug smugglers are so versatile and clever these days...we can’t trust you. Open the seal! Come on!”

It got worse.

I had another vial with white bicarbonate of soda and clearly labelled. Bicarbonate of soda has at least 20 benefits for cooking and a cleanser for smelly toes, armpits, sore throat, and the eyes.

BoS was recommended and prescribed by an eye doctor. Due to car smoke, industrial waste and dust our eyes and noses absorb lots of dirt in modern cities. Putting a few drops of BoS in water then using a cotton bud to clean the eye lashes that hold and carry numerous pollutants help prevent eye infections. That scientific explanation did not seem to impress the excited border outfit.

“Drug smugglers are getting very versatile and dangerous these days....we won’t be fooled!”

The senior officer arrived, panting. By his reaction and mannerisms he did not seem to know nor believe that bicarbonate of soda can be a deodorant.

Phone calls were made.

The saga of BoS appeared more serious than ever.

Transporting cocaine from London to Tanzania? Twenty minutes later a security technician confirmed these were not illegal drugs.

Followed ten more minutes of apologies and explanations about policing our East African borders.

“Nowadays, our youths are succumbing to drugs and marijuana. We have to be vigilant.”