Marriage is among the highest, hardest, holiest and happiest callings

A marital relationship resembles eating lasagna. Lasagna is an Italian dish with five layers or more. There is a layer of cheese, a layer of vegetables, a layer of sauce, meat, sausage, etc. In the same way, marriage is like this mixed grill; there’s a layer of love, a layer of excitement, a layer of anger, a layer of disappointment, a layer of joy and pain, and a layer of romance, to mention a few. But altogether, not a bad combination.

This week I want to talk about four important layers in a marital relationship. Marriage is one of the highest, hardest, holiest, and, lastly, happiest callings. Unfortunately, we’re living in a society that underrates marital commitment.

One of the highest callings: It’s not an accident that marriage is the first human institution; it’s completely intentional as designed by the creator. Marriage is the nucleus and bedrock of the whole human society. The creator, God, comes first; then marriage and family come second. The stability of any society is directly related to the stability of marriages. This is why marital relationships are considered one of the highest callings in the world.

In modern times, the concepts of “holy matrimony” and “sanctity of marriage” are becoming foreign. This institution has undergone so many changes, and many people now view marriage as no longer a lifelong commitment. Postmodernists view marriage as a partnership that can be dissolved if it becomes entangled by challenges. However, creating a solid society does require us to view marital relationships as permanent and priceless.

One of the hardest callings: Almost 50% of all United States marriages end in divorce, and worldwide divorces outnumber weddings; all this shows that although many people enter marriage with excitement, marriage is not easy. Marriage requires preparation, the right knowledge, and the right principles to make it last a lifetime.

One of the holiest callings: Marriage is a sacred relationship that needs awe, sanctity, and seclusion. In this regard, when approached rightly, marriage can help in producing holiness in people, creating a healthier world society. When there’s a holiness notion, two individuals make the relationship public, putative, permanent, and official.

Marriage serves as a fundamental social structure that organises relationships and family units within a society. It establishes roles, functions, and expectations for partners, children, and the extended family.

One of the happiest callings: Marriage is supposed to be fun, enjoyable, and fulfilling. A good marriage brings joy. Living together in harmony makes partners feel loved, cared for, cushioned, and comforted. Nurturing emotional connection beautifully makes partners support each other, which in turn makes them happy. A caution though: happiness much depends on an individual’s inner orientation rather than outside circumstances.

As I finish, the right living and right estimations will make partners avoid living in a hell of anger, suspicion, infidelity, and insecurity, and with a bit of hard work, marriage becomes a haven of peace and happiness.

Amani Kyala is a counsellor, teacher, and writer; [email protected]; 0626 512 144.