‘People who lost properties, INCLUDING relatives, shall be aptly compensated’
We came across this beauty somewhere in Kinondoni District, Dar es Salaam. Now what does it mean by “WILL DILL”? Nothing! We aver the signwriter was assigned to paint “WE DEAL” Further to that, we say “We deal IN… (not with) this or that business. Trust signwriters! PHOTO | AMS
We have a bagful of linguistic gems we are sure will fill this space to the brim, which is why we shall skip our usual introductory blah-blah and move on to share out the goodies with you. Here we go…
On Page 1 of Bongo’s senior-most broadsheet of Saturday, August 15, there is a Page 1 story entitled, ‘TZ strong GDP growth to CREATE WEALTH, REDUCE POVERTY—AfDB.’
The headline’s content is reiterated in the intro, with the scribbler writing this: “Tanzania’s strong economic growth has the potential to CREATE WEALTH and REDUCE POVERTY, with the real gross domestic product expanding by 6.0 per cent in 2025…”
This is a really “feel good story,” what with the continental lender telling us that things are not as bad as they may look to some. Bongo is not just getting by; it is getting on! Our concern, however, is the idea of talking about wealth creation and poverty reduction as if they are different things.
Our view is, by creating wealth, you are in effect reducing (if not eradicating) poverty in society. A certain linguistic guru we contacted in regard to the headline said, actually, for his part, saying “strong GDP creates growth creates wealth and reduce poverty is stating THE OBVIOUS, and that is not what newsmen and women are employed to do!
The lead story for Page 4 is entitled, ‘Plans afoot to revive monkey trade,’ and for his intro, the scribbler writes: “The Government has finalised plans to revive COMMERCIAL BUSINESS in baboons and monkeys, WITH AIM to reduce their numbers in residential areas…”
Commercial business in…? Why not, simply, “COMMERCE in…” or just “BUSINESS in…”. And, we don’t say “with aim to…:” we say, “with THE aim to…”
Towards the end of the story, our scribbling colleague purports to quote a minister as saying: “People who lost their properties INCLUDING RELATIVES will get compensation…” Oh, Lord, nope! Relatives are NOT properties; they are persons; human beings. We are certain the minister said this: “People who lost properties AS WELL AS RELATIVES will be compensated…”
Page 18 of the broadsheet treats readers with a refreshing photo spread, entitled ‘Kizimkazi festival in pictures.” One of the eight independent photos has a caption whose headline reads: “Participants enjoying THE performance.”
The reader is certain to ask, “What performance?” Yes, what with the use of definite article “the” instead indefinite article “a.”
Finally, we move on to share what obtains in Bongo’s huge and colourful broadsheet of Monday, August 7, whose Page 3 has a story thus headlined: ‘Norwegian church AID steps in to provide lifesaving HIV treatment following AID disruption in northern Tanzania.’
We consider using the word “aid” twice in a headline unnecessary! Monotonous. How about a rewrite that would eradicate the monotony? Here it is: ‘Norwegian DONOR steps in to provide lifesaving HIV treatment following AID disruption…’
Then, in his intro, the scribbler says: “Thousands of individuals living with HIV in northern Tanzania have expressed PROFOUND gratitude to Norwegian Church Aid (NCA) for providing emergency funding and medical support following termination of funding from the United States…in 2025.”
We have said it before in this space; let us say it again today: the role of a news scribbler is to report bare, measurable facts, avoiding emotionally-charged words.
He casts away words that only a PR officers for an organisation may use liberally in press releases he sends to newsrooms. In this particular case we would have suggested a deletion of the adjective “profound.”
