‘When I Think of You’ by Myah Ariel: All’s well that ends well

When you face a lot of closed doors, it is easy to lose faith in yourself. You start believing the voices telling you your capabilities and skills are insufficient. This is Kaliya's reality in When I Think of You by Myah Ariel.

Kaliya encounters sexism, racism, and the many barriers that women, especially women of colour, face in a world designed to benefit men. Despite her experience and passion, she’s denied a promotion beyond her role as a receptionist in Hollywood's film industry.

This second-chance romance follows Kaliya and Danny, who first met at university while studying film production. Kaliya is a determined and passionate woman who dreams of telling stories through movies. However, she learns that passion and hard work sometimes are not enough to make dreams a reality. Danny, on the other hand, comes from a privileged background. His father, a legendary figure in the industry with multiple Oscars, and his mother, Minnie, a professor, pave an easier path for him.

“They tell you, ‘Don’t meet your heroes.’ Well, the same should be said for all the dreams we dream up as kids. Because even when you are almost there, reality reminds you that almost doesn't count.”

After seven years apart, Kaliya and Danny’s paths cross again when Danny gets to produce a movie based on his parents’ love story—a biracial relationship that endured numerous challenges, including racism. Their reunion is complicated by Danny’s current relationship with Celine, his business partner in the movie, who uses her privilege to shut more doors on Kaliya as the story progresses. 

Danny is shocked to find Kaliya working as a receptionist. He recalls her college days when her talent and dedication seemed destined to lead her to a successful career in filmmaking. Learning of her struggles, Danny offers Kaliya a position as a director’s assistant, only for it to be given to Bella, the niece of a company executive. This highlights how nepotism can strip qualified individuals of opportunities, favouring those with the right connections. 

“I’m sorry, you know,” Bella said softly, recapturing my attention. “I heard through the grapevine that my job was originally meant for you.”

We often hold grudges for years, holding onto anger about what could have been, which stops us from fully living in the present. Kaliya has been carrying her hurt for seven years, weighed down by the past. The moment she decides to let go of the baggage, she starts to live her life as it was meant to be.

“Now is a good opportunity to stop being a bag lady. Someone who hoards all her trauma and drama, packing it away in various bags for safekeeping. Carrying them along with her wherever she goes so she can unfurl them from time to time, if only just to admire all her problems. It is time to move on.”

When grief knocks on your door, you do not know how it will manifest during its stay. When Danny loses his father, he struggles to process this loss. “We can read a million pamphlets and watch a hundred talk shows on the topic, but nothing prepares you for what it feels like. It is gaping and persistent and cold,” Danny said. Watching his mother’s heartbreak traumatises him enough not to want to experience such kind of love because he does not believe he can endure if anything happens.

Through all the ups and downs that Kaliya has to overcome, Ariel reminds readers of the importance of allies. Allies who acknowledge our struggles and provide emotional support are crucial. Kaliya finds such allies in her friendship with Neha and Bella. Ariel skilfully portrays the importance of female friendship. These friendships create space for women to feel, heal, and grow unapologetically.

“Neha is my best friend, and she recognises that we’ve veered off into rocky terrain; she latches on to the one part of my rant that matters most at this moment. “I’m your ally,” she says, reaching across the table and grabbing my hand with a teary look in her eyes.”

Ariel’s writing is lyrical and poetic, making it an easy read. However, the story is told from the point of view of one main character, Kaliya, which makes it challenging to connect with the other characters. Multiple points of view would have enhanced the emotional depth, making the characters more relatable and likeable.

Despite this, When I Think of You is an enjoyable read that encourages readers to rethink their dreams and find the courage to change their course. It reminds us that even if your direction was south, shifting north might give you satisfaction as you discover yourself and your ability to endure and persevere.

Jane Shussa is passionate about books, coffee, nature, and travel. She serves as a Senior Digital Communications Officer for Twaweza East Africa.